Regular
| While preparing an upcoming wingnutological report on dragons (the longcoming "Wingnuts Take Flight!") I stumbled upon an even crazier version of Otherkinism: People claiming the Matrix ripped off their life stories; not only ripped them off, but got them wrong. Through their story and others, I have come up with some guidelines for turning fiction into fact.
Guideline #1: Steal outrageously.
Meet Neo and Trinity. You might have seen their movie. Did you know it was based on a true story?
 
Let Neo explain:
My name is Neo.Was I born with 'Neo' on my birth certificate? Of course not: but names have power, and in some cultures an individual's name actually changes based on the significant events of their life. In a life I once left behind, I became Neo: and thus, it remains. If you've come this far, and you're reading this, then you've probably heard of me; although that's not something I'd have chosen if it had been up to me, it's what I have to deal with, now. So if you've heard of the name, then you know: I'm the same Neo that has been represented in popular culture, in the movies, in a thousand pieces of writing, essays, comics, what have you. [Basically, things that usually make me want to crawl under a very large, and cozy rock.] Friend of Morpheus and Niobe, among others. Former crew member of the Nebuchadnezzar. The One, as they say, although on my worst days I think that that's not only impossible but almost laughable. Sometimes. I wonder. Now. Before I go any further, the moment of truth has arrived: the explanation. Let me first say this, and get it out of the way: This is not a 'fan' site, this is not a role-playing page, this is not a 'character' journal or an "ARG" or a concept page about the 'Matrix' movies. This is not wish-fulfillment, this is not a 'game', online or otherwise. When I say, 'I'm Neo' -- I'm deadly serious. So if you're looking for some nifty quotes/pictures/RPG clubs/fanfiction/whatever; this is the wrong place. Although you still may find something here that moves you. God knows I can hope. [Spoooooon!--Ed]
Responding to a blogger's criticism of them and their shenanigans, Neo and Trinity bequeeth us our next guideline:
Guideline #2: Truth is what you say it is.
Trinity demonstrates:
Originally Posted by Trinity
In your rant, you basically said that Neo, in order to be who he is, has to conform to the role of Neo from the P[opular]C[ulture] and any other traits that you think he MUST have, in order for his identity to be true. Neo nor I should have to validate our existences to you. Just because you saw some movie in which we were portrayed, does not mean that you would have a clue as to what we SHOULD be like. Sorry to disillusion you, buddy, but we are not Keanu and Carrie-Anne.
Whoops! My mistake. Here's what they actually look like.
 Trinity: Picture Not Available. Visual approximation:
Originally Posted by Trinity, continuedIf proof of who we are is so important to you, then prove that we are not who we are yourself. Prove that we do not remember and feel what we do. And in the end you would still be wrong, for your findings will not change the memories we share or the feelings we have. And YES, in your rant you were attacking our memories. A person is made up of their memories and their purposes. Sourcetacular
Ah yes, the familiar refrain of the wingnut. You must prove me wrong. If you find the claim that I have a shape-shifting tiger in my hand questionable, then prove me wrong! Prove I don't remember having one and prove--I'll be darned--if I don't FEEL like I'm holding one! Go on now, prove it!
People are always going to vary in their opinions regarding Neo. Some people believe that he is a nut bag for doing and believing what he does. Others have called him 'prophet' and 'messiah'. *smiles* I am one of them, and we are rapidly becoming the majority. And no one pushed any of us to believe what we believe. People have come to this themselves, after reading his writings, and hearing him speak. After getting to KNOW HIM. You see, we don't put great value in labels, but some of our people do, and they have given him their own, based on what they have taken from the message.
"Damn skippy, Trin. Ya'll best jump aboard this here bandwagon before ya'll get left behind. We're headin' to Zion! Yeeehaw! We's gonna have a ho-down in a cave all the whiles you and Neo have an awkward roll in the hay! Yippy-kay-yay!"
The cast of 'The Matrix' got fat paychecks.
We just got stuck with the nightmares.
Trinity
Woe is Trinity. Boohoo.
Originally Posted by Neo*shrugs.* I'm answering because I'm having a good morning. Realizing how drastically my reactions have changed; how solid I am in myself and my Purpose. Actually, writing this out made my whole morning even better. And I'm actually starting to laugh every time someone calls us a cult for lack of anything better. It ought to be a drinking game.  Look! I'm still Neo! *faints from shock!* Amazing, the difference several months of support, honest friendship, and belief can have on self-confidence in so few months. So maybe the OP did succeed to an extent; and after all, it's all about perspective.
Neo Ex Machinae
How can it be that someone is Neo and someone is Trinity?
Guideline #3: Metaphysics is your friend.
- Alternative 1: If that fails use a concept from another branch of philosophy or science you don't understand.
- Alternative 2: If that fails, use a concept from an instance of one of the following genres: science fiction, fantasy, horror, other.
I'll be happy to explain the melange of quantum physics that we and many people believe is responsible for bringing us here, now, to this world... [3 paragraphs omitted] Everything that can exist, does. Energy follows thought, and there are infinite parallel existences out there beyond our own; this has been proven by mainstream science as well as philosophy. Every decision we make opens another parallel path in which we made the opposite choice, or no choice at all; and people who may be considered 'fictional' in this world, our subjective reality, are just as 'real' as we are, on another plane of existence. And sometimes... they cross over. Very rarely, and even more rarely with intact memories... a lot of people, after knowing us, have come to refer to it as "quantum reincarnation". Close enough, I guess.
That's a pretty good explanation; but I prefer the one from Last Action Hero. Come on, just say you came out of the movie screen due to a magic golden ticket. After all, that's how I got here... Mr. Anderson.
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
That was silly.
On second thought, you're right: quantum twaddle is the way to go.
Neo's site: Truth of the Spoon. OMFG that NAME! Truth of the spoon... He has video sermons for your lampooning pleasure. He knows you're gonna laugh. He invites you to go right ahead because in order to laugh, you'll have to listen to him.
I've seen bizarre appropriations of fiction occur before. This other case involved the psychic Phyllis Schlemmer appropriating Star Trek.
PHYLLIS V. SCHLEMMER AUTHOR OF THE ONLY PLANET OF CHOICE
The Only Planet of Choice is based on the communications transceived through Phyllis' deep-trance work from an enlightened circle of universal beings known as "The Nine". The international research group also had among them the "Star-Trek" creator: Gene Roddenberry. When Roddenberry asked them where they came from, their answer was "the zone you call cold in Deep Space". Does "Deep Space Nine", the hugely popular television sequel to "Star-Trek", sound familiar?
Wow, the Nine even intoned the capital letters and everything!
Now check out this neat trick:
Critics of individuals who support The Ashtar Command on this planet have accused them of "playing Star Trek." What if they found out that the actors on "Star Trek" were actually playing Ashtar Command? Have you ever noticed that the Star Trek insignia looks like the letter "A?"
It is documented in The Only Planet of Choice, compiled by Phyllis V. Schlemmer and Palden Jenkins (Bath, England: Gateway Books, 1993), that Gene Roddenberry attended channelling sessions led by Ms. Schlemmer and "Tom" of the "Council of Nine"
"Council of Nine: Tribunal Teachers governing our immediate super-galactic and galactic region, subject to change in evolving 'new programs' of the Father's kingdom.). It has been alluded to from other sources that Roddenberry had been a Commander or received his inspiration from sitting in on channelling sessions."
Want to steal an idea from a fictional source? Claim the fictional source stole it from you! It's all out there in the collective unconscious for the taking. Check out my attempt:
I am a Xenomorph spiritually.
Woohoo!
You say there are no myths or legends about Xenomorphs? I bet I could cherrypick and appropriate some descriptions from ancient texts to find some. But I don't need to because there is a movie about them! You don't honestly believe Ridley Scott, H.R. Giger, and various others involved made it up do you? No, they got the idea from the Great Beyond just like Phyllis Schlemmer claims Gene Roddenberry got the idea for Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. It's all part of the collective unconscious. It's as the Quran says: there is nothing new under the sun. Why can't xenomorphs exist? What, just because you haven't seen one and documented it to your liking? Well that's just plain ignorance.
So there you have it. I hope you know how its done now.
- Appropriate fiction by claiming the fiction ripped you off.
- Criticize others for thinking you have to conform to some standard set by the piece of fiction.
- If you need help justifying it, appeal to metaphysics, dualism, mysticism, channeling, or any logical fallacies you find convenient.
Presto chango fiction to fact! |
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| Victor Stenger has a good article on "quantum quackery" in the Skeptical Inquirer that summarizes and addresses similar claims.
Nevertheless, quantum mystics have greeted the possibility of nonlocal, holistic, hidden variables with the same enthusiasm they show for the conscious wave function. Likewise, they have embraced a third view: the many worlds interpretation of Hugh Everett (Everett 1957).
Everett usefully showed how it was formally possible to eliminate wave function collapse in a quantum theory of measurement. Everett proposed that all possible paths continue to exist in parallel universes which split off every time a measurement is made. This has left the door open for the quantum mystics to claim that the human mind acts as sort of a "channel selector" for the path that is followed in an individual universe while existing itself in all universes (Squires 1990). Needless to say, the idea of parallel universes has attracted its own circle of enthusiastic proponents, in all universes presumably.
This review has a concise description that comports with my experience of the quantum leg-humpers:
Quantum mysterions may embrace science in principle, but they have little more interest than creationists in learning about it in practice. Under their adoring gaze, the mathematical formalisms of quantum mechanics, which make concrete predictions accurate to dozens of decimal places and which underlie the technologies of microchips and lasers, are stripped of all empirical content and reduced to a set of syrupy nostrums. At the same time, quantum mysticism promotes a vision of spiritual satisfaction achieved not by the hard transformative work of ritual or study, but by the mechanism of consumer choice. In the infinite sea of possibility here promoted, nothing is real except what you choose to accept. Which is not that far from the creationist position — there, too, empirical evidence is brushed aside and reality becomes what you’d like it to be.
There also seems to be an intersection between quantum twaddle and postmodernism which can be found on google under postmodern science and quantum philosophy. Hey, look here's an example. He mentions quantum physics and Kuhn in the same post. Cool. |
From Fiction to Fact in Three Simple Steps
